Quote of the Day

"Christian God is the one and only true living God, the creator of Heaven and the Universe! ... I love Jesus! Jesus Christ is God! Jesus Christ is the son of God! ... Jesus Christ is god, Barack Obama is the Antichrist!"

-- Anonymous heckler at last night's House of Blues fundraiser event in Los Angeles as President Obama was speaking

I'm too busy right now to be able to come up with a decent punchline -- and luckily with this I don't have to.

In the words of the kid from Animal House: "Thank you, God!"

Gods and Monsters

That New York Times article dissecting the Tea Party -- the one I published a quote from earlier today -- is revealing on so many levels that it's worth referencing more than once. While the first excerpt I posted highlighted a fact that shouldn't surprise anyone -- namely that, while loud, the Tea Party isn't very big and it's certainly not very popular -- another finding within the story is even less surprising. It answers the question, "Just what is the Tea Party made of?"

Remember that the people who wrote the article have been studying the rise of the movement that would ultimately become the Tea Party since 2006.

"So what do Tea Partiers have in common? They are overwhelmingly white, but even compared to other white Republicans, they had a low regard for immigrants and blacks long before Barack Obama was president, and they still do.

More important, they were disproportionately social conservatives in 2006 — opposing abortion, for example — and still are today. Next to being a Republican, the strongest predictor of being a Tea Party supporter today was a desire, back in 2006, to see religion play a prominent role in politics. And Tea Partiers continue to hold these views: they seek 'deeply religious' elected officials, approve of religious leaders’ engaging in politics and want religion brought into political debates. The Tea Party’s generals may say their overriding concern is a smaller government, but not their rank and file, who are more concerned about putting God in government."

What does this mean? Simple: the Tea Party is basically nothing but the hard-right, conservative Christian wing of the GOP as it has existed for years. Again, no surprise there at all. This is why for all the shouting about how smaller government and controlled spending are at the top of the list of their demands, the tea baggers as a group have been engaging in horseshit misdirection pretty much since the beginning. When George W. Bush was throwing taxpayer dollars around like he was President Diddy, the then non-existent Tea Party didn't give a damn -- that's because Bush was a white, conservative Texan who may as well have been wearing a giant diamond-encrusted Jesus piece around his neck, his religious affiliation was so obvious. He was forgiven his transgressions -- hell, they weren't even considered transgressions -- simply because of who he was and how comfortable he made the usual suspects among conservative America. It's only after the guy in the White House morphed, against their divinely inspired will, into a black, multi-cultural, progressive "elitist" who represented the kicking down of the castle gate they'd always taken for granted would be in place to protect their dominion that they collectively decided to raise holy hell.

Incidentally, in a somewhat related item, I continue to get amusingly irate e-mails from people who remain less than pleased with the crack I made about Sakina Mengle's role in the Tea Party movement; for those who don't remember, Miss Mengle is the black woman featured on the "Diverse Tea" website and someone who contacted me and called me out for my admittedly juvenile joke at her expense.

Miss Mengle and I had a very nice conversation, if you recall. Her Tea Partying supporters aren't quite as magnanimous.

Behold, Pierre:

"You are a disgusting turd! The Tea party is made up of all sorts of people who are concerned for America's future. And I am quite confident each of them is more intelligent than you and more informed, and less filled with racial prejudice. It is an inclusive group which is positively focused and doesn't make disparaging remarks about someone of color who supports, and is entitled to support, another point of view. Learn about American democracy and get a life!"

Yes, Pierre. The Tea Party doesn't make disparaging comments about someone of color who supports other points of view besides its own. Unless, of course, that person happens to be the President of the United States.

Big fan of anything, though, that calls somebody a turd and still manages to be pretty articulate.

Will and Disgrace

These days, particularly with the political divide in Washington as substantial and insurmountable as it is, there's very little that's more offensive than a politician arrogantly invoking the supposed will of "the American people." Think about how often you've heard that phrase in just the past few weeks, from dozens of different leaders from both sides of the aisle. It's generally the worst kind of cliché: a pompous politician claiming to speak for the entire republic and to be doing its collective bidding. But recently it's become flat-out insulting, given that it's impossible for any representative from either party to bridge the gap between the highly polarized political extremes and only the most lunatic among the electorate actually want to see government gridlocked to the point of threatening the world.

Still, if you needed confirmation of that which you very likely already knew, a new poll proves unequivocally that when guys like John Boehner, Eric Cantor, Mitch McConnell and Jim DeMint claim that their intransigence is nothing more than a case of succumbing to the will of the people, they're basically full of shit. The Tea Party and the ever-widening extremist wing of the Republican party may be loud, but they're not very big. According to a CNN/Opinion Research survey, just 33% of the American public currently hold a favorable view of the Republican party, compared to 59% who have an unfavorable view. If you're looking for context, yes, those numbers are as dismal as they sound. The Democrats, meanwhile, are holding relatively steady -- and even -- at 47% favorable and 47% unfavorable.

Both sides have played a role in creating a profound nationwide distrust of and distaste for our current government, but make no mistake -- the Republicans are rightfully getting most of the blame. What's most noteworthy about this, though, is that as of this morning the usual suspects within the GOP are continuing to tout their absurd stance on slashing entitlement and social programs while waiting in line to slavishly get on their knees and blow Grover Norquist as a simple case of doing the people's work. And you can be damn sure this will continue unabated.

The people have spoken loud and clear, saying that they overwhelmingly want to see corporate tax breaks ended, loopholes closed, and the wealthy forced to pay their fair share -- but if you think for a moment that something like verifiable reality will stand in the way of the Republicans' agenda and a lot of propagandistic nonsense about how it's all being done under the direction of the masses, you're crazier than one of those old people sitting in a lawn chair cheering the U.S. credit downgrade.

That's because they don't work for the average American. They don't work for you, and they never have -- not lately anyway.

Salon: Could the Tea Party Actually Be Obama's Salvation in 2012?/8.11.11

Quote of the Day

"What makes America look unreliable isn’t budget math, it’s politics. And please, let’s not have the usual declarations that both sides are at fault. Our problems are almost entirely one-sided -- specifically, they’re caused by the rise of an extremist right that is prepared to create repeated crises rather than give an inch on its demands."

-- Paul Krugman in yesterday's Times

Rick Dross

Rick Scott perfectly personifies everything that's wrong with the far-right and with the unfocused Tea Party rage that thrust a bunch of maniacal idiots into power in the 2010 elections. He's a guy who made a fortune as the CEO of a massive for-profit health care company but who was forced out when that company was found guilty of fourteen felonies and had to pay the government back $600 million in a Medicare billing scandal. In other words, he basically operated a criminal enterprise. Since beating Democratic opponent Alex Sink by a razor-thin margin last year, he's pretty much run Florida into the ground -- an admittedly impressive accomplishment given that it was in such bad shape to begin with -- and made himself a man with almost no friends or supporters to speak of. Rick Scott is, no bullshit, the most profound and expansive case of buyer's remorse in the history of Florida politics.

If you're curious as to why he's so universally regarded as a guy who couldn't manage a 7-11, just watch his performance on CNN this morning. Christine Romans, and eventually a smelling-blood-in-the-water Ali Velshi, pound him into paste over both his inability or unwillingness to answer questions about the debt ceiling debate, and, apparently, his lack of knowledge of what the debt ceiling even is.

This man is the governor of the fourth most-populated state in the country.

Mediaite: Two CNN Anchors Try, and Fail, To Get Florida Governor Rick Scott To Answer Their Debt Ceiling Questions/7.27.11

By the way, as I mentioned earlier today, watch how quickly Scott employs the go-to GOP talking point about how government needs to be run like a business. And then ask just about anyone in Florida how well that's worked out for them under Scott's administration so far.

Fail-Safe

You had to know that something like this was coming.

The Huffington Post: House Democratic Leaders To Obama: Invoke the 14th Amendment/7.27.11

The reaction by the right to that kind of move would be seething, homicidal rage directed toward the White House and the Democrats. I don't even need to elaborate on that.

Of course there's an argument to be made that, really, not a thing would change.

This is what it's coming to. Unbelievable.

Quote of the Day

"I’m ready to drive the car."

-- GOP Rep. Allen West of Florida

West reportedly stood up and said this after watching a clip of -- prepare to make the disconsolately confused Daffy Duck face -- Ben Affleck's The Town, which House Republicans have apparently watched as a kind of motivational tool during the current debt ceiling debate. The scene in question features Affleck's character approaching Jeremy Renner's character and saying, "I need your help. I can't tell you what it is; you can never ask me about it later, and we're gonna hurt some people," to which Renner responds, "Whose car are we gonna take?"

Get it? Allen West says he'll drive.

So the Republicans are watching a movie about bank robbers to get themselves pumped for battle. And this was leaked presumably to strike fear into the hearts of their enemies, so that everyone could know just what kind of testosterone-filled bad-asses the GOP is made of. And Allen West is, of course, assuming the role of the murderously crazy guy in the movie, the one who goes down in a hail of police gunfire. I swear, if this weren't so catastrophically sad it would be hilarious. You just can't make this kind of adolescent crap up anymore.

Still, there's never been a better metaphor than whack-job Allen West being handed the keys to a car -- which he'll then drive right over a cliff, with all of us in it.

"We're gonna hurt some people."

Indeed.

Update: Affleck is now responding to the fact that the House Republicans appear to be his new biggest fans by saying, "I don't know if this is a compliment or the ultimate repudiation." He then goes on to suggest the GOP watch another film he starred in, one he feels is more appropriate for them: The Company Men. I've actually got an even better suggestion, the most obvious one of all.

Learning Disabled

As God is my witness, this is not from the Onion. It's from an article in the St. Petersburg Times about a Tea Party summer camp supposedly being sponsored by the 912 Project, called the "Tampa Liberty School."

Behold, an example of Poe's Law in its purest possible form:

"'One example at Liberty: Children will win hard, wrapped candies to use as currency for a store, symbolizing the gold standard. On the second day, the 'banker' will issue paper money instead. Over time, students will realize their paper money buys less and less, while the candies retain their value.

'Some of the kids will fall for it,' Lukens said. 'Others kids will wise up.'

Another example: Starting in an austere room where they are made to sit quietly, symbolizing Europe, the children will pass through an obstacle course to arrive at a brightly decorated party room (the New World).

Red-white-and-blue confetti will be thrown. But afterward the kids will have to clean up the confetti, learning that with freedom comes responsibility.

Still another example: Children will blow bubbles from a single container of soapy solution, and then pop each other's bubbles with squirt guns in an arrangement that mimics socialism. They are to count how many bubbles they pop. Then they will work with individual bottles of solution and pop their own bubbles.

'What they will find out is that you can do a lot more with individual freedom,' Lukens said."

My first thought: No way this is for real. It's so insane -- as Alex Pareene over at Salon says, it anticipates every possible joke you could make and beats you to it -- that it just cannot be anything other than brilliant satire.

Because if it isn't -- we're even worse off than I thought.

Quote of the Day

"One day after Rep. Eric Cantor (R-VA) stirred controversy by withholding funds for tornado relief, the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) took the extraordinary step of declaring Rep. Cantor a disaster area. Within hours of the declaration, FEMA officials were dispatched to assess the damage to Mr. Cantor’s status as a human being capable of empathy."

-- Andy Borowitz, in the Borowitz Report

Man, I hate to steal Cesca's ongoing refrain, but seriously -- keep it up guys, you're doing great. The supposedly mainstream Republicans have allowed themselves to be completely hijacked by the loud but relatively small contingent of tea bagging nutjobs at the fringe of their party -- and they're going to pay a huge price for it with the voting public. Need proof? Last night a nobody Democratic candidate named Kathy Hochul won a stunning victory in a special election in New York's 26th district; that's a district that votes Democrat about as often as Burlington, Vermont votes Republican. Hochul won by hammering home the point I made just a couple of hours ago: whatever this hyper-libertarian brand of politics is that the Republicans are now engaging in in an effort to appease the Tea Party dolts, it's metastasized into something that doesn't care one bit about the average American. From Paul Ryan's Medicare-decimating budget to unconscionable dog-shit like Cantor's willingness to hold federal funds for tornado victims hostage, the message is clear -- and if it keeps up it's going to spell destruction for the GOP, at least in the short term.

But now that I'm bringing it up, there's something else I've wanted to touch on for a while. Yes, it's true that stupidity, like shit, rolls downhill, and dumb parents will inevitably pass on their dumb traits to their kids, creating an entirely new generation to populate the Idiocracy. But the demographic make-up of the country is changing rapidly: it's becoming "browner," more multi-cultural, more of a true melting pot than it's ever been before. And if you don't think that the Tea Party, above all else, is a response to that terrifying scenario for white, Christian America, you need to have your head examined (provided it's still covered by your insurance carrier). I've said for a long time now that the Tea Party "revolt" is based not exactly in racism, per se, as much as profound xenophobia -- the knowledge by those who have traditionally been in power that "their country" is being systematically taken away from them. It's inevitable that eventually America will be not simply home to but in control of people from many different backgrounds (and nothing proves that more than the election of President Obama, hence the visceral hatred of him by some). What does this mean for the Republican party as it now exists and for what it now believes in? One word: doom. The Tea Party outrage is basically the death throes of the current GOP political model. What the Republicans have stood for, campaigned on, pandered to and enabled over the last several decades is, to put it bluntly, unsustainable. This isn't opinion -- it's fact.

Quote of the Day

"We need you to come in and lock shields, and strengthen up the men who are going to the fight for you. To let these other women know on the other side -- these planned Parenthood women, the Code Pink women, and all of these women that have been neutering American men and bringing us to the point of this incredible weakness -- to let them know that we are not going to have our men become subservient. That’s what we need you to do."

-- Republican Rep. Allen West of Florida, addressing the members of Women Impacting Nation

I'd run down the list of staggeringly stupid things West has said since emerging onto the political scene and being sent to Congress by the shit-kicking dolts of southern Florida, but we'd be here all day. Suffice it to say that between this bit of unapologetic misogyny and his poetic plea that America needs "Spartan women to make Spartan men," from the same speech, I think it's safe to say that the only one crazier than ex-Colonel West here is Mrs. West.

By the way, that Spartan women comment, as well as the above quote, for some reason immediately made me think of the sign on the parade float in Animal House that read, "When Better Women Are Made, Faber Men Will Make Them." It's worth noting that the way men reacted to the women's movement was still in its bumbling infant stages in 1962, when the movie is set, and that gives you a good indication of where West's mindset remains to this day -- like most Tea Party darlings, still clinging to that hallowed vision of late 50s-early-60s America, where women and minorities knew their place. There's delicious irony, of course, in the fact that West is black is and yet not only seems to long for a world in which he'd be drinking out of his own water fountain but that he takes the side of the Alpha Dog in the equation, believing he's been endowed with special dominion over all creatures by the creator. But when I think of the Animal House comparison, one thing immediately comes to mind, and I'm not sure this can be argued with: Allen West is basically the black Doug Neidermeyer.

Quote of the Day

"Who is going to shoot Obama?"

-- Question asked by an attendee at a town hall event hosted by Georgia Republican Rep. Paul Broun on Tuesday

What's more alarming than the question itself (as it likely came from one of Oglethorpe County's many redneck dumb-asses) was the answer (which came from a member of the United States Congress).

Broun didn't immediately denounce the remark -- he didn't even say, "Look, regardless of how angry you are you can't ask me something like that; it's unconscionable to even make a joke about the assassination of the President of the United States, especially in the current political climate and given the recent shooting of an elected official who sits about fifty feet away from me in the House."

No, as you might expect, Broun entertained the staggeringly irresponsible comment by responding with a tepid, "I know there’s a lot of frustration with this president. We’re going to have an election next year. Hopefully, we’ll elect somebody that’s going to be a conservative, limited-government president that will take a smaller -- who will sign a bill to repeal and replace Obamacare."

Seriously, Broun's answer shouldn't surprise anyone -- after all he's the spineless asshole who spent the last State of the Union address doing this.

(Update: In addition to TPM now reporting that Broun himself laughed at the question -- as did the rest of the audience at the meeting -- the Secret Service is releasing information about the commenter. It describes him as an "elderly person," with another audience member calling him "some old man." Surprise!)

Comment of the Week

"Wow! I am suprised at the vitriol I read here. I too will pray for you sir and hope that you find joy in something good for once. I research what Glen Beck says thoroughly and find he speaks the truth. I have observed his 'rantings' and find them heartfelt and honest. Of course, the Huffington post that you work for accepts major cash donations from George Soros who has a beef with Glen for exposing his plan for the U.S. monetary system. How much are YOU getting paid to deride him sir? Your boss also says the same things that Mr. Soros says. Post this if you are truthfull and honest, sir, and take your best shot and please, please, keep your comments to that which you can prove and cite sources. As I said before, my prayers are for you and those you work with."

-- Brad Roe Sr.

Yes, every time my weekly Soros check clears I literally pour that big bag of money onto the bed and roll around in it naked, à la Demi Moore in Indecent Proposal. It's a testament to just how hilariously gullible Beck's zombiefied acolytes are that they'll believe the Soros-as-Evil-Puppet-Master meme even so far as being willing to buy into the idea of him paying out a legion of hapless relative pipsqueaks like me.

The interesting thing is that this is the piece Brad is commenting on -- from, oh, you know, March of last year:

"The Glenn Beck Show Generator" (Originally Published, 3.18.09)

Swallowed as a single, sour dose, the average episode of Glenn Beck's nightly cable show goes down like liquid acid and produces just about the same result. To the uninitiated viewer, watching an hour of Beck's psychotic ravings, crackpot conspiracy theories, maudlin tales of personal tragedy, and generally demented sky-is-falling routine must feel a little like stepping out of reality and into a Dali painting. But while no one jumps the crazy train as far off the rails as Beck these days, there is a certain method to his madness -- you just have to take a couple of steps back and look at the big picture for it to come into focus. As with any kind of seemingly incomprehensible insanity, there are patterns amid the chaos; the hallucinatory mania that fuels Beck's delusional behavior actually adheres to a pretty strict set of rules, even if those rules are based on fantasies and thought processes only Beck himself understands.

In other words, there's a blueprint to his batshit luancy. His shows follow a relatively by-the-numbers formula. In fact, once you crack the code of crazy, just about anybody can put together an episode of the Glenn Beck show.

Give it a try yourself. Just follow the simple multiple choice format below.

Open & Welcome: Glenn says hello, thanks everyone for watching and spends a few minutes...

1. Repeatedly asking the director to zoom in on his face while he screams about how the United States is on the "road to socialism."

2. Misappropriating the works of Ayn Rand.

3. Adjusting himself in his seat and creepily stroking his nipples while making faces which would indicate that he's taking no small amount of pleasure in it.

Glenn then welcomes his first guest (who agrees with everything he says):

1. Dennis Miller

2. Art Bell

3. His psychiatrist

Followed by a second guest (who disagrees with everything he says):

1. Dennis Kucinich

2. Al Sharpton

3. Shepard Smith

Glenn points his doughy finger and tells the guest he's/she's...

1. An enemy of the state.

2. A "scumbag."

3. Melting right before his eyes.

Then, apropos of nothing, he compares Barack Obama to...

1. Hitler.

2. The 9/11 families -- whom he still hates.

3. Troy Sullivan, the kid who lived up the block from him as a child and would come by when no one was home and make him dress up in his sister's clothes for "afternoon tea," although there was never any tea -- just pain, so much pain.

...And blames him for...

1. ABC's decision to cancel Twin Peaks.

2. His erectile dysfunction.

3. Everything.

Glenn then boasts about...

1. The overwhelming public response to that ridiculous "912 Project" initiative.

2. The numbers his show is pulling down at Fox, particularly in comparison to what he was getting at CNN.

3. What a friend he has in Jesus.

...And introduces a brand new segment of the show with the obligatorily muscular sounding name:

1. "The War Chest"

2. "The Men's Room"

3. "The Tool Box"

The goal of which is to...

1. Map out various apocalyptic scenarios since the inauguration of Barack Obama, as a service to America's paranoid survivalist sociopath community.

2. Prove that the moon landing was a hoax.

3. Impress Sarah Palin.

Next, once again apropos of nothing, he blurts out something random and completely irrational, like...

1. "There it is! Do you hear that? Don't tell me you can't hear that!"

2. "We surround them!"

3. "The government!"

...And claims that _____ is _____:

1. FEMA/constructing internment camps for America's dwarf population

2. global warming/bullshit

3. he/so fucking high

He then begins to cry uncontrollably because, in his personal life...

1. His wife Tania is finally divorcing him.

2. His AA sponsor committed suicide.

3. The hemorrhoids are back.

Finally, he composes himself, smirks, chuckles, and reminds viewers that...

1. He's so fucking high.

2. Due to a tachyon bombardment created by Ozymandias, he doesn't, in fact, have the ability to see the future.

3. It's all an act to get ratings.

Glenn thanks his sponsor...

1. Entenmann's

2. Supercuts

3. Zoloft

...And plugs his...

1. Book.

2. Radio show.

3. Ears against the voices.

Close & Goodnight: Glenn says, "Thanks so much for joining us tonight, and remember to tune in to the show tomorrow for..."

1. "Day 1,113 of my sanity held hostage."

2. "My exclusive interview with an angry chimpanzee dressed as Lyndon LaRouche."

3. "The end of days."

Toss to Special Report with Bret Baier, go home and sleep it off.

Moonbats

The stupid. It burns.

Gawker: Does This Google Veterans Day Logo Look Muslim To You?/11.11.10

Someone's Listening

There's something going on in South Florida right now that might be worth paying close attention to.

Stop me if this sounds familiar: Yesterday, every public school in Broward County -- all 300+ of them -- were locked down for most of the day after a "credible threat" was apparently made against them by someone who called in to a local radio show. Turns out that radio show belonged to Joyce Kaufman -- a conservative talk show host who, last July 4th, took to the mic to say that "if ballots don't work, bullets will," and who recently ranted that America is in danger of "losing our culture" to illegal immigrants.

The latest is that the police have the suspect in custody who reportedly made the threat -- according to his wife, his claim was that he was going to shoot up a school or a government building -- and that he's being anything but cooperative.

On the surface, this reads like yet another case of some far-right firebrand with a microphone urging revolution and, not surprisingly, finding that somebody in her audience is willing to take her up on it. We've seen it before -- we know that we will absolutely see it again. But here's the twist: Joyce Kaufman was recently picked to be the Chief of Staff for incoming Florida Republican Congressman and Tea Party darling Allen West (they're pictured above). She was going to Washington, DC with him.

I say was because, as this story began breaking just a couple of hours ago, Kaufman immediately backed out and said that she won't be taking the job.

Let me go back to the beginning. Every kid who goes to a public school in Broward County, Florida had to be locked inside his or her classroom yesterday. For hours. Because one wingnut psychopath may have promised violence at the irresponsible and incendiary goading of a conservative talk show host.

More to come.

Really.

(Update 4:26PM: Here's the official write-up from the AP: MIAMI (AP) — A conservative radio talk show host tapped to be chief of staff for incoming U.S. Rep. Allen West is stepping down from her congressional job a day after 300 Florida schools were locked down when a threat was linked to her show. Joyce Kaufman announced Thursday that she would not be West's aide. Kaufman said on her show that she wants to avoid any repercussions to the Florida Republican, but she didn't elaborate and hasn't returned telephone messages. Kaufman has drawn fire for some of her comments. At a recent tea party rally, she told the crowd that if "ballots don't work, bullets will." Police have said the message to Kaufman from the suspect mentioned gun rights but they have refused to release its contents.)

Epic Rail

Watch this -- all twenty minutes of it.

The Beating Generation

For those who haven't yet seen this video of Rand Paul supporters attacking a protester in Kentucky last night, it's as reprehensible as it gets -- and it provides a perfect little snapshot of just how angry, psychotic and far past the boiling point the tea bagger crowd has grown as the final days days before the election dwindle down.

Look, I'm not a huge fan of Moveon.org -- but a bunch of guys stomping on the head of a woman?

You're fucking kidding me, right?

Tuesday Is Recycling Day

I've republished and referenced this piece more than once since it was originally posted. But as a complement to last night's post on Glenn Beck -- and in deference to the new readers currently roaming around this place -- I'm putting it up again. Honestly, it's shocking to read this and think that I wrote it more than a year ago. As I said at the time, that was just the beginning of the madness.

"Revolutionary Goad" (Originally Published, 4.7.09)

Exactly how far is too far?

Several times over the past month or so, I've dismissed Glenn Beck, the new clown prince of Fox News, as being not much more than a guy doing Kaufman-esque stand-up -- an opportunistic little turd who's playing his audience of paranoid conspiracists like a badly tuned piano in the name of making himself rich. At one point, I even admitted that Beck was basically good, clean fun -- or at least would be until some tinfoil-hatted psychopath who took his nonsense way too seriously decided to fire off a few rounds at President Obama.

But given what we're now seeing, the question has to be asked: Is it just a matter of time before something like that does in fact happen?

Over the weekend, a man in Pittsburgh gunned down three police officers who showed up to the home he shared with his mother on a domestic disturbance call. He strapped on a Kevlar vest and armed himself with an AK-47, waited for them to come through the door, then picked them off one by one. The details that have come out about the shooter since the attack are as infuriating as they are not-the-least-bit-surprising: 22-year-old Richard Poplawski is identified as a Marine Corps wash-out, a recently unemployed white supremacist who believes that the Jews control the media and that, most tellingly, the Obama Administration is planning to ban his beloved guns. In other words, he's exactly the kind of guy who, if you went on TV and told him that his worst paranoid hallucinations were coming true and that the new left-wing government was indeed poised to kick down his door and take his freedoms away, would believe every fucking word of it and act accordingly.

And if you don't think that that's exactly the message the Richard Poplawskis of this country are being inundated with from the far right these days, you're even more delusional than Poplawski himself.

Over the space of just the past couple of weeks, Glenn Beck has warned his loyal, terrified viewership of the coming socialist junta; lunatic congresswoman Michele Bachmann has claimed that the U.S. dollar is about to be replaced by foreign currency, American youths will soon be sent to "re-education camps," and patriotic citizens should be "armed and dangerous" and ready for revolution; disgraced CNBC loudmouth Jim Cramer has called the Democrats "Bolsheviks" and compared the U.S. House of Representatives to the Politburo; and Dick Morris, the no-lie smarmiest shitbag alive, spat this little pearl of wisdom into the Fox News echo chamber:

"Those crazies in Montana who say, ‘we’re going to kill ATF agents because the UN’s going to take over’ -- well, they’re beginning to have a case."

In case you missed that, let's rewind: Dick Morris says that militaristic nutjobs willing to kill government agents now have a fucking case.

Once again, exactly how far is too far?

While free speech has to be respected and the right to it protected, is there no line of rhetoric so incendiary, so dangerous, so shameless in its aim of instigating simply for the sake of ad revenue, that it can't provoke absolute outrage? If you know that there are an inordinate number of Richard Poplawskis listening to you and that they already buy thoroughly into half-baked persecution fantasies -- and then you purposely try to at best validate their fears or at worst scare the hell out of them even further -- don't you bear at least a small amount of responsibility for the outcome? Shouldn't there be accountability?

In a display of hypocrisy that's almost staggering, many on the right who once railed against the twin evils of violent video games and Marilyn Manson and decried their supposed relation to teen violence are now hiding behind the very argument they say bleeding-heart liberals used against them way back when: that you can't blame the messenger for the effect the message might have on one or two unstable individuals. To his credit, Bob Cesca has a good take on this specious comparison; he points out that the difference between, say, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold -- the Columbine killers -- and someone like Richard Poplawski is that Harris and Klebold, while certainly being budding gun fetishists, hadn't yet developed the intransigent political ideology that goes hand-in-hand with a maniacal worship of weapons in this country. Harris and Klebold, like Cho Seung Hui -- the Virginia Tech killer -- were basically impressionable kids using guns to lash out and make themselves feel powerful (the latter, a trait they indeed shared with Poplawski and one that should have precluded them from ever owning a goddamned gun in the first place). They loved guns, sure -- but they didn't yet have the distrust of a government they feared would one day come and take their precious weapons away. Poplawski was impressionable in another way in that he did think that his weapons made him part of a larger culture of True Believers, and any confirmation of an attack on the way of life espoused by he and those like him would be all it took to set him off. And it did. Poplawski likely always figured his guns could be used to level the socio-political and economic playing field, and in his twisted mind, that's exactly what happened.

But for those who would still claim that everyone is impressionable in his or her own way and that, at some level, both the creators of GTA4 and Glenn Beck need to acknowledge that their actions may have unintended consequences: You're right, to an extent. The bottom line is that while free speech and expression must be respected, there has to be a level of responsibility attached. It's reckless, dangerous and immoral to knowingly stoke the demons of a person's nature -- and what's worse, to pass off fantasy as fact and do it in the name of making a buck or a political point. It's intellectually dishonest to pretend that you're operating in a vacuum -- whether you're Marilyn Manson or Michele Bachmann -- and that nothing you say will have an impact on the crazies within your target audience.

So, I ask yet again: How far is too far?

I talked to my father a few days ago. He's an ex-cop and ex-Navy SEAL who now lives part-time in a little Florida town called Sebring -- right in the center of the state's hyper-Republican I-4 Corridor. He's had a concealed weapons permit for decades and is about the most qualified and responsible person I can imagine being allowed to carry a weapon. He mentioned to me that he had recently been to the local Wal-Mart looking for ammunition for his handgun -- the kind of thing that's typically in abundance at a Central Florida big box store. But what he found surprised him, and scared him a little.

The place was almost completely out of ammo. In fact, it turns out they can barely keep the stuff on the shelves these days.

Somebody out there is listening to the "warnings."

And I'm betting that what we've seen lately is just the beginning of the nightmare.

Quote of the Day

"Nancy Karibjanian: What opinions, of late, that have come from our high court, do you most object to?

Christine O'Donnell: Oh, gosh. Um, give me a specific one. I'm sorry.

Karibjanian: Actually, I can't, because I need you to tell me which ones you object to.

O'Donnell: Um, I'm very sorry, right off the top of my head, I know that there are a lot, but I'll put it up on my website, I promise you.

Wolf Biltzer: We know that you disagree with Roe v. Wade.

O'Donnell: Yeah, but she said a recent one.

Blitzer: That's relatively recent.

O'Donnell: She said 'of late.' But yeah. Well, Roe v. Wade would not put the power -- It's not recent, it's 30-something years old --

Blitzer: But since then, have there been any other Supreme Court decisions?

O'Donnell: Well, let me say about Roe v. Wade -- If that were overturned, would not make abortion illegal in the United States, it would put the power back to the states.

Blitzer: But besides that decision, anything else you disagree with?

O'Donnell: Oh, there are several when it comes to pornography, when it comes to court decisions -- not to Supreme Court, but federal court decisions to give terrorists Mirandize rights. There are a lot of things I believe -- This California decision to overturn Don't Ask, Don't Tell. I believe there are a lot of federal judges legislating from the bench.

Blitzer: That wasn't the Supreme Court. That was a lower --

O'Donnell: That was a federal judge. That's what I said. In California."

-- From last night's televised debate on CNN between Delaware Senate candidates Christine O'Donnell and Chris Coons

You know that scene in The Lost World where the tyrannosaurus comes bursting out of the cargo hold of the ship after tearing apart the crew, then proceeds to stomp off toward downtown San Diego while people scream and panic all around it -- and Ian Malcolm leans in to Peter Ludlow and says, "Now you're John Hammond"?

Well, that nationally televised moment last night when Christine O'Donnell completely melted down and you could practically see the gears inside her pea brain crunch to a halt, all I wanted to say was, "Now you're Sarah Palin."

That being said, I was thinking yesterday that even though it really does look like -- as with her mentor -- she doesn't stand a chance of making it to Washington through the usual channels, it probably doesn't matter anymore. Christine O'Donnell -- once again, like her mentor before her -- is now a celebrity, which means that if she wants it that way, we'll likely be saddled with her in one form or another for months if not years to come.

I will give O'Donnell one thing, though: I get the impression that she's a genuinely nice person and not half the mindless machine of naked ambition and opportunism that her personal Svengali is, so maybe if we're lucky she won't really know how to milk her new reality TV star status and will fade away into the annals of pop culture ephemera -- a mere object lesson to future generations, reminding them of a time when the political landscape was suddenly ruled by people with a whole lot of ideologic rhetoric and unfocused outrage, but not a lot of smarts.

Assistant Quote of the Day

"I would have never started watching Fox News if it wasn't for the fact that Beck was on there. And it was the things that he did, it was the things he exposed that blew my mind."

-- Byron Williams, who was arrested on July 18th after getting into a fire-fight with the California Highway Patrolmen who had just pulled him over, inadvertently stopping him from driving to San Francisco where he planned to kill members of the Tides Foundation and the ACLU

Beck gets out his chalkboard and tells whack-job the Tides Foundation is subverting America. Whack-job arms himself to the teeth and hits the road with the intention of killing people at the Tides Foundation. Nope, no connection there.

Water Into Whine

The Washington Post's Dana Milbank is currently hawking a book, which means that, provided you run in certain highly insulated political media cicles, you're likely to hear a whole hell of a lot over the next couple of weeks about how Glenn Beck is practicing mind control with the goal of creating an army of Hoveround-riding septuagenarians to help him enslave the human race. While it concerns me a little that some of Milbank's claims and theories, at face value at least, sound as far-fetched and conspiratorial as Beck's own lunatic ravings, Milbank has the benefit of being an actual journalist as opposed to, say, an ex-Morning Zoo DJ now doing Kaufmanesque performance art because it's made him obscenely wealthy. So when Milbank says that it's entirely possible Glenn Beck is using coded language to pitch an obscure Mormon end times prophecy -- as opposed to the not-at-all-coded language he uses to pitch Goldline's horseshit scam -- I at least give it some consideration.

This is the kind of thing I can only recommend reading for yourself, so you can come to your own decision about whether you think it's legit.

The Huffington Post: "Mormon Prophecy Behind Glenn Beck's Message" by Dana Milbank/10.5.10

One thing, though, that can't be argued with is the all too real bukkake of crazy that regularly comes out of the giant fleshy pink knob that is Glenn Beck's head. Milbank has taken it upon himself to document in admirable detail -- admirable because I don't know how the hell he sat through hours and hours of this nonsense -- some of Beck's most absurd conspiracy fantasies.

For example:

"Beck explained -- without benefit of actual fact -- that Obama's advisers favor health-care rationing and sterilants in drinking water, and then he went on to endorse Sarah Palin's allegations that Americans would have to stand before Obama's 'death panel' so bureaucrats could decide who was worthy to live."

Ignore the death panel gambit, because by now that particular scare tactic is practically a classic. Hearing some tea bagging idiot bring up death panels is almost kind of satisfying at this point. It's like hearing the opening guitar riff of Satisfaction at a Stones show; you can't help but go, "Oh, fuck yeah! I know that! Woooo!" No, what's actually far more impressive is the whole "sterilants in the drinking water" claim. That's genius in that it fires on all paranoid cylinders at once: there's the eugenics implication, the fear of infestation, abjection and body horror, the rise of an authoritarian state and eventual dystopian future -- it's a veritable dumb-ass DSM IV.

But as I've mentioned before, like the rest of Beck's unoriginal shtick, the panicked warnings of an inevitable threat to our water supply, well it just sounds so familiar -- like I've heard it someplace before.





Be honest, how much do you feel like Mandrake in that first scene every time Beck figuratively puts his arm around you as an American and unleashes a torrent of delusional paranoia as if what he's saying is somehow completely rational?

(via Cesca)