"Being a lawyer must be nice because you can meet up with everyone you’re working with and all agree to not do your job. Like the DA is supposed to prosecute people they were told committed a crime, and a judge is supposed to preside over the trial, but they can all huddle up and say fuck that. They can say, 'that shit is gonna take forever, and it sounds hard, so let’s not do it.' And then the other person says, 'oh my god, I know right, did you see all the papers and stuff for this, there’s like a million files.' And then they all nod and don’t do it, and we all just sort of take it. It would be like going to a doctor for heart surgery and then scheduling the heart surgery and then when you got there instead he just gave you some jumper cables."
-- Brendon at What Would Tyler Durden Do? on the deal Mel Gibson struck with the Los Angeles DA's office that allows him to avoid jail time
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