Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Old Testament


Apparently, naming Miramax after their parents Mira and Max wasn't enough of a mitzvah toward America's Jewish octogenarian community for Bob and Harvey Weinstein; they've just announced that Weinstein books will be publishing what it calls "the definitive autobiography of Larry King," entitled What Am I Doing Here? (coincidentally, the same thing many in the book's target demographic say after being stopped by police while wandering lonely roads in hospital robes at four in the morning -- although in defense of the name, Interview with the Vampire was already taken).

Ever the master of understatement, Harvey Weinstein claims that the book "will be absolutely devoured by Larry King's millions of fans." You have to assume that this assessment fails to factor in the number of Larry's followers who, between now and the book's 2009 release date, will grow tired of a steady diet of apple sauce, colorful pills, and unproductive trips to the bathroom and make that final decision to go into the light. Larry King himself has also already contributed the first disproportionately positive blurb for the book, saying, "This is the greatest work in the history of old Jewish guy biographies!"

On the plus side in all of this, The Boondock Saints just became the second worst project the Weinsteins have ever attached themselves to.

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