My wife tells me that most of what I've written lately has been on the heavier side, and as usual she's right. Unfortunately, being that it's a soul-chilling three degrees outside and my instinct to hibernate has kicked in, I'm going to take the easy way out and just post somebody else's excellent work.
First up, the only way to truly enjoy what is an otherwise worthless videogame...
And, well, this one's for the troops...
*Should you ever, at any point in your life, decide to try your hand at internet dating and come across a person -- male or female -- who lists this dubious personality trait as one of his or her most attractive qualities, please understand that from that point forward it's your sole responsibility to humanity to kill that person and dump his or her body in a river somewhere.
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